Resolutions

I am once again making my new years resolutions.
Losing weight has always been my resolution for the past 15 years. I've tried and tried and I'll keep trying until I lose my weight.
I'm not healthy. I have high blood pressure, acid reflux asthma and in the past several years have suspected that I have fibromyalgia. The sharp stabbing pains I have just have been a lot to deal with lately. And I'm tired of them.
So I'm making the resolution to get healthy, again. I have too.

My second resolution is to stay in touch with my cousins. For most of them it will be easy to do but there are 2 that I have issues with.
My cousin is my uncles daughter. Mom and Dad are divorced. After the divorce Angie's Mom got very nasty towards my family. Making snide comments about my uncle and trashing my family name. Angie follows in her mom's footsteps. At her graduation and her wedding she completely ignored the family, my family. She did it in a way that it was very obvious and hurtful. She does things and did things that were very hurtful to my family and my grandmother. When my son diagnosed with MS neither she nor her brother showed concern nor asked about Rick. When my Mom was diagnosed with leukemia again they never called her. They live 15 minutes away.Where my other cousins who live in Texas and California called my Mom and sent cards.
It's hard because I have so much animosity towards them, especially Angie, but yet I know I'm suppose to ignore my feelings because it's pleasing to God. So I sent both a Christmas card in it a Christmas letter with request of their e-mail addresses. Telling both I want to keep in better touch. We'll see......
My third resolution is to be a better christian. To outreach to others and my family. To set an example of what a christian is. I want people to see how I live my life and want what I have it.
These are the resolutions I'm going to strive to accomplish.

Endings and Beginnings

This week was full of emotion, happiness, sadness and anger.

Today was the last week at the school I've been at for the last 6 years. I've made many, many friends here and have gone to care about the middle school kids. That did take a bit they do tend to have a certain attitude but I adjusted to it.

The last day the 8th grade team had cake and bagels for me. There was tears and laughter and it all too soon ended.
Then my cooperative teacher had a meeting, one in which she made one of my friends a scapegoat for things she couldn't cope with. Then to top that I was to have a exiting interview with my principal I set a time but that didn't work so he told me he would come up to get me and then we could do it. He blew me off. So I had the interview with the assistant principal. There is a power struggle between the 2. Our assistant principal is new and not the one the our principal preferred.

I had several issues that concerned me, including some books that I think my cooperative teacher has taken. Newly purchased books.

So I left the school feeling angry and happy that I was leaving.

I really feel that God was getting out of the middle of a situation that could really hurt me. I've been in that position and have gotten burned for it.

The next day, Friday was my first day at the grade school. It was an institute day so there were no kids. I think I'm really going to like my new job home. It's much smaller so I don't think it'll take long to get to know the building. I'll be working with a 3rd, 4th, and a kinder. 4th grade is in the mobiles. The staff is friendly and the principal is extremely supportive. I do wish that I could have taken a couple of my friends there but.....maybe in the future.

A Commentary

My Dad sent this to me, I just felt it needed to be heard by more than my e-mail list. Enjoy.

A lot of truth in this

The following was written by Ben Stein and recited by him on CBS Sunday Morning Commentary.

My confession:

I am a Jew, and every single one of my ancestors was Jewish. And it does not bother me even a little bit when people call those beautiful lit up, bejeweled trees Christmas trees. I don't feel threatened. I don't feel discriminated against. That's what they are: Christmas trees.

It doesn't bother me a bit when people say, 'Merry Christmas' to me. I don't think they are slighting me or getting ready to put me in a ghetto. In fact, I kind of like it. It shows that we are all brothers and sisters celebrating this happy time of year. It doesn't bother me at all that there is a manger scene on display at a key intersection near my beach house in Malibu. If people want a creche, it's just as fine with me as is the Menorah a few hundred yards away.

I don't like getting pushed around for being a Jew, and I don't think Christians like getting pushed around for being Christians. I think people who believe in God are sick and tired of getting pushed around, period. I have no idea where the concept came from that America is an explicitly atheist country. I can't find it in the Constitution and I don't like it being shoved down my throat.

Or maybe I can put it another way: where did the idea come from that we should worship Nick and Jessica and we aren't allowed to worship God as we understand Him? I guess that's a sign that I'm getting old, too. But there are a lot of us who are wondering where Nick and Jessica came from and where the America we knew went to.

In light of the many jokes we send to one another for a laugh, this is a little different: This is not intended to be a joke; it's not funny, it's intended to get you thinking.

Billy Graham's daughter was interviewed on the Early Show and Jane Clayson asked her 'How could God let something like this happen?' (regarding Katrina) Anne Graham gave an extremely profound and insightful response. She said, 'I believe God is deeply saddened by this, just as we are, but for years we've been telling God to get out of our schools, to get out of our government and to get out of our lives. And being the gentleman He is, I believe He has calmly backed out. How can we expect God to give us His blessing and His protection if we demand He leave us alone?'

In light of recent events...terrorists attack, school shootings, etc. I think it started when Madeleine Murray O'Hare (she was murdered, her body found recently) complained she didn't want prayer in our schools, and we said OK. Then someone said you better not read the Bible in school. The Bible says thou shalt not kill, thou shalt not steal, and love your neighbor as yourself. And we said OK.

Then Dr. Benjamin Spock said we shouldn't spank our children when they misbehave because their little personalities would be warped and we might damage their self-esteem (Dr. Spock's son committed suicide). We said an expert should know what he's talking about. And we said OK.

Now we're asking ourselves why our children have no conscience, why they don't know right from wrong, and why it doesn't bother them to kill strangers, their classmates, and themselves.

Probably, if we think about it long and hard enough, we can figure it out. I think it has a great deal to do with 'WE REAP WHAT WE SOW.'

Funny how simple it is for people to trash God and then wonder why the world's going to hell. Funny how we believe what the newspapers say, but question what the Bible says. Funny how you can send 'jokes' through e-mail and they spread like wildfire but when you start sending messages regarding the Lord, people think twice about sharing. Funny how lewd, crude, vulgar and obscene articles pass freely through cyberspace, but public discussion of God is suppressed in the school and workplace.

Are you laughing?

Funny how when you forward this message, you will not send it to many on your address list because you're not sure what they believe, or what they will think of you for sending it.

Funny how we can be more worried about what other people think of us than what God thinks of us.

Pass it on if you think it has merit. If not then just discard it... no one will know you did. But, if you discard this thought process, don't sit back and complain about what bad shape the world is in. My Best Regards.

Honestly and respectfully,

Ben Stein

Too good to be true?

I have always believed in prayer. I believe God hears my prayers and answers them maybe not the way I would like them to be answered but he does answer them.
When Rick was diagnosed with MS, my faith I believe wasn't shaken. I never blamed God but I did go to God for my strength. Thru this I discovered that I wasn't trusting God like I thought and have learned to trust for anything. I still need work, I still need to improve, I still need to believe. My mom told me today that she went to an MS support group meeting recently and found out that by the year 2010 they will have ablitherated MS!
I'm happy but why am I doubting? Where's my faith? I prayed for a cure like so many others. Others for longer than I have, so why am I not believing. I trust God, I believe this great and awesome news!
Maybe because it's not in my timeframe, I thought it would take longer. I've always been told and thought we found out about Rick and MS at a good time.
I do believe in answered prayers.

Dealing with storms

The last 2 posts I made have been things that have touched my life, made a difference in how I thought about living my life. I felt maybe typing them completely out I would help someone else. So that being said I hope I touch someone elses life by what I write next.
I have read, watched, and listened to many different things that have changed me, but all have helped in how I deal with storms in my life. I have realized I didn't really know how to deal with storms. That God was in control and he watches over me constantly. God can be nothing more than love. He just doesn't know how to be anything else.
A situation made a drastic change in my personality when I was a young girl. I was molested by a family friend, when I was 8 yrs old.
I was an outgoing girl who sang for anyone. That outgoing little girl became a shy, inward girl. Books were my best friend which helped that my mom was a librarian. Now I'm not saying I didn't have friends but I know my shyness didn't help me in getting new friends, better friends. The friends that I did have didn't made me feel very smart so anything that I thought I would like to do with my life, I didn't feel I was smart enough to do.
Now that I'm older and have had to deal with storms I know that I am smart. I have a job that I just love. Now, I'm trying to find that outgoing girl who loved to sing in front of people.
Which is why lately I'm facing a fear of getting up in front of people, by myself.
I've always was in chorus and choir. Getting in front of people in a group was ok but getting up in front of people by myself I stayed away from.
I'm hoping that in getting in front of others this way I will be able to sing again.
Like it says in the Bible: I can do all things thru Christ that strengthens me!

Stop asking 2 questions

Stop asking 2 questions by Phil Cooke
I've beome a virtual Jedi-Knight right out of Star Wars when it comes to email. I've learned to receive email on my computer or cell phone through wireless networks, cell phone links, or I can get it off any other computer anywhere in the world. When it comes to email, I'm really never out of touch. And I was very proud of myself until the thought occurred to me that when I get to heaven, Jesus isn't going to pat me on the back and say, "Hey Phil, great job on the email." I rather think He's going to ask me whether or not I accomplished my calling and assignment during my lifetime.
That's when I started thinking abou the difference between what we think is urgent and what really matters. Our lives are filled with things other people think are urgent--things like phone calls, voice mail, email, faxes, overnight deliveries--all kinds of appointments, activities, schedules, work, and more.
But how often do we stop to think about what really matters in our lives?
When it comes to being "slaves of the urgent," there are 2 questions we ask ourselves way too often:
1) How much will it cost?
2) When will it be ready?
We've let our lives be controlled by money and schedules, and we've forgotten about dreams and visions.
I sat on an airplane not long ago next to a woman who looked like she was about 40 yrs. old. When she discovered I worked in the TV industry she got really excited and told me the following story:
"When I was in high school, I was the best actor in our drama department. I starred in all our school plays and really loved it, so I naturally decided acting was what I wanted to study in college. My parents were very supportive, so they drove me to a number of universities so we could take a look at their drama departments. It was all very exciting. But after a few visits, I realized that most actors study drama in college for 4 years, then go on the graduate school, and most continue taking classes thoughtout their lives. And when I added it up, it seemed like that would take a really long time and cost a lot of money. Between the expense, and the length of time it would take, I finally decided it was just too much, so I stopped acting."
She wiped a small tear from her eye and said, "That was almost 20 yrs. ago, Today, I'm a credit manager at a used car lot in California, and every single day I wake up and realize that decision to stop acting was the worst decison of my life. I gave up on my dream because I thought it would take too long and be too expensive. Today, I would pay any amount of money or wait as long as it took if I could only make that decision over again. But now it's too late, and I'll never achieve my dream."
She turned, a little embarrassed, and looked out the window realizing that she had considered the cost and how long it would take, she had made a short-term decision. Unfortunately, it left her without long-term satisfaction.
Someone once asked me, "Is what you're living for worth Jesus dying for?"
If it's not, have you considered that it may not be too late for your to start moving toward the dream that God put in your heart? You might think, like the woman on the plane, that you've missed your opportunity. But perhaps there's still time in your life to change course. You may want to think again, and ask God to help restore, in you, His dreams and visions for your.

A meek and quiet spirit

This past week in my devotional has been devoted to being a good wife. Now I've been married quite a few years and thought I was doing good. But like everything in my life I know I can always learn more. That is what I did.
The last day of this devotion was about "What is a meek and quiet spirit" and the author wrote about a meeting he was a part of in Kiev. After the morning meeting a large table was set outside on the driveway where all the special guests were seated so they could be served Ukrainian borsch for lunch.
He noticed that an elderly woman, about 75 yrs. old, was the primary person serving lunch to them that day. As she passed by him, he looked into her face and saw the deep wrinkles that testified to a very hard life. This was a woman who had faced many intense challenges in the course of her life.
Yet when he looked into her eyes, he could see that this was a woman who was very strong in spirit. Although it was evident that she had lived a hard and difficult life, it was also evident that she had never been broken by hardship. The look in her faded blue eyes gripped him, for those eyes seemed to literally radiate life from within her.
He watched with amazement at the way this elderly woman carried bowls of borsch to this person, then to that person, and then to the next. It was obvious that she was delighted to serve the pastors who sat around the table. The tender smile that graced her face and the sweet spirit with which she served captivated my attnetion. As he kept watching her, he thought to himself, This woman must be one of the most beautiful and grace ful women he'd ever met in his life.
Finally, he turned to the elderly pastor sitting next to me, and asked, "Who is that woman?"
He looked at him with a sparkle in his eye and glowingly said, "That's my wife."
During the Soviet years, this pastor had been arrested and sentenced to 15 years of prison because of his faith. While he was in prison, his wife had been completely responsible for rearing and providing for their 15 children. As he told him their story, he began to understand why she had such deep wrinkles--a sign of the many hardships she had faced while her husband had been in prison.
Despite her wrinkles and gray hair, this woman's indomitable spirit shone through and was evident for all to see. This was a woman who had lived a godly life. This was no weak woman, but a very strong and very capable woman.
He continued to watch the pastor's wife aas she kept serving the men around the table, smiling graciously as she refilled empty bowls with more borsch. As he oberved her stong but gentle spirit, He thought of Peter's words to woment in 1st Peter 3:3, 4. Whose adorning let it not be the outword adoring of plaiting of the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on the apparel; but let it be tht hidden man ofthe heart, in the which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.
He goes on the say later that meek woman is not weak, timid or soft-spoken. The work "meek" is the Greek word praus, a word that describes the attitude of one who is friendly, warm, forbearing, patient, kind and gentle. Although a meek person faces opportunities to react in anger or to get upset, he aor she has chosen to be controlled, forgiving, and gentle. So, "meek" people are individuals who have become skilled at controlling themselves and their temperament. You might say that meekness is power under control.
God highly values a woman who becomes this kind of strong, steady force in the home.
This is the type of person I want to be one that keeps from outbursts of anger, is not offended by comments made by uncaring people. Keeping my temper and remaining calm when storms come.
I may not be able to do this all the time, but I'm sure going to try.

exerpt taken from Sparkling Gems by Rick Renner pp 753,754.