Today I go for my first treatment. I can say that I'm feeling ok.
Yesterday when we got back home I started focusing on something I saw in one of my reports. It was a negative thing and it started to upset me,made me doubt and it was taking away my peace.
I prayed, 'God I know your with me but, I really need some help here.'
That's when I got out my Bible's and my book, Battlefield of the Mind and started reading.
I re-read and looked up verses I had highlighted and highlighted them in my Bibles. The reason I say Bible's is I have a few in different translations but this time I used my NIV and my New King James Version that is amplified.
As I kept reading the verses I started feeling better and the doubt and fear went away.
Today I have my CD's going so I am hearing positive words.
I know things will work out because God is here and he has a plan. I am just along for the ride.
For no temptation (no trial regarded as enticing to sin, no matter how it come or where it leads) has overtaken you and laid hold on you that is not common to man [that is, no temptation or trial has come to you that is beyond human resistance and that is not adjusted and adapted and belonging to human experience, and such as man can bear]. But God is faithful [to His Word and to His compassionate nature], and he [can be trusted] not to let you be tempted and tried and assayed beyond your ability and strength of resistance and power to endure, but with the temptation He will [always] also provide the way out (the means of escape to a landing place), that you may be capable and strong and powerful to bear up under it patiently.
1 Corinthians 10:13
Friday, January 2, 2009
Today we had a follow up appointment with Dr. Warren at Rush University Hospital. My Mom and Dad went with us with Daddy driving.
We left extra early to factor in traffic because we would be in the middle of rush hour. Well, needless to say, there really wasn't any traffic. We got to Rush in a hour 15 minutes so we were there in plenty of time for my 9 o'clock appointment.
We had a lot of good news from Dr. Warren. He told us that the tumor wasn't all the big. The reason for not putting in a stint was because it wasn't necessary. He took off the tumor and widened the trachea. He said he may need to do that again or he may not.
So my question that I have in my mind is: Was the tumor always not very big or was it bigger and something happened to make it shrink, like God?
I want to think that God shrunk it. It was my prayer and many others.
Radiation on the inside would be something he would perform. He said it would be very simple to take down the shoot and zap the tumor from the inside.
But the other members of the team want to start from the outside.
Also about my voice. He told me that there is a very non-evasive procedure that an ENT can do that wouldn't take surgery to do. They would move my vocal cord more in the center. From the outside with a needle. We would try to do this if my voice was strained all the time.
These 2 procedures may be in the future.
On Monday I'll get blocked/ tattooed and Dr. Bhate will tell us the plan for the treatments.
Probably on Tuesday I'll start both Chemo and Radiation. Chemo will be once a week and Radiation will be 5 days a week.
So this was a great day, we got great news and didn't drive in rush hour traffic.
So we are ending this year with Good feelings and starting next year with those same Good feelings.
He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, 'He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.' Psalm 91: 1,2